Run like hell

Today is my long run day: 7 miles 

I’m in training for the Smuttynose Half Marathon which is only 8 weeks away in October. 13.1 long, windy miles along the coast. It’s not gonna be the prettiest race I’ve ever run, but I’m determined. To survive, I’ve committed myself to a dedicated training plan. I am doubtful about my skill set at best, but on I press.
Here was the succession of thoughts inside my runner brain:
Mile 1- “this rain is awesome!”
Mile 2- “sooo glad I got up early to warm up and stretch. This is a breeze.”
Mile 3- “Yeah, I got this! *music kicks into power stride song* I am so in the zone today and LOVIN’ this rain!”
 Mile 4- “this hill isn’t as bad as I remembered it to be. My training is really starting to pay off! Oh look! A bunny!!! I love running so much!”
Mile 5- “I hate hills. I hate them like the devil hates good deeds. Oh. Good. ANOTHER hill. Awesome. I hate hills.”
Mile 6- “I hate everything. My thighs are burning and look, fanfuckingtastick, another bloody fucking hill. I’m going to die in the fucking rain on the side of the fucking road. This was a stupid idea. When/if I get home I’m going to throw every dish in the damn house against a wall.”
Mile 7- “There is no end in sight. I swear the voice prompt lies. Lies like a lying liar. There’s no way I’m not done yet. This app is a fucking LIAR. I feel violent. And look, another fucking hill. What a surprise. I hate running.”


*home, stretched, cooled down and showered”
“GOD that run was awesome. I so needed that. Maybe I’ll sign up for a nice 10K the week after Smuttynose….”

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Blogger, life enthusiast, queen of chaos. Author and star of #closertocrazy, and Hairbeast Productions. I live in north central Massachusetts on a tiny misshapen, entirely accidental farm. Life is always an adventure! Available for freelance writing and social media Brand Building consultation Contact me at to discuss projects and fees

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