An unexpected life

I’m curled up in my favorite hammock swing, a soft grey blanket pulled close around me, legs tucked, body swaying gently in the easy afternoon air. I climbed into the swing for comfort. Alone with the sounds of my chickens clucking softly, birds chirruping, leaves rustling, occasional airplanes and trains in the distance, I shove all thought from my head. When I woke today, I was so certain about so many things, anxious about what each hour might hold. When I feel like my life is spinning out of control, I shrink my space to the size that I can manage. Sometimes my space is as wide as the world, some days it is a small as the ground that I stand on, or even my very heart. Today is not the day I expected and planned it to be. It’s not a bad thing or a good thing it simply is a direction I didn’t plan to head in. I’m reflective often enough to understand that most of my life seems to be so…unexpected. A myriad of emotions are swirling inside me and I retreat to the space of my heart beating. Just the beating. That is the size I can manage. My heart seems to be thudding heavily, slowly. I can almost feel the push and pull of the muscle and blood. That is how small my space is today. My heart is beautiful. It’s strong. It has survived the unexpected so often that I am confident in its power to heal. My heart loves deeply. I decide to widen my space enough to watch myself in this moment. I am alive and I am strong and I welcome every turn of this unexpected life.

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Blogger, life enthusiast, queen of chaos. Author and star of #closertocrazy, and Hairbeast Productions. I live in north central Massachusetts on a tiny misshapen, entirely accidental farm. Life is always an adventure! Available for freelance writing and social media Brand Building consultation Contact me at to discuss projects and fees

4 thoughts on “An unexpected life”

  1. You are alive, beautiful, kind, compassionate, and the small space with I fathomable depth of your heart is indeed a safe and wonderful place. Be at peace my dear, and know that you are bolstered by the care and prayers of we who love you so completely!

    Truly yours,



    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dear heart, on those days when space seems immeasurable, expanding then contracting, and almost always unexpected, or at least unplanned. Finding that safe space when all is closing in and those “walls” seem to be crushingly closer and closer, I close my eyes, and look within myself, creating that special room, where silence drapes my windows creating a safe haven and opening my heart and mind and soul to the quiet voice of God within. You are the temple of God, and His Holy Spirit dwells within your heart and soul, soothing your mind with peace-filled moments.

    Liked by 1 person

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